CM Punk to AEW confirmed, CM Punk to AEW confirmed,

Coming up on today’s news - CM Punk to AEW confirmed, CM Punk to AEW confirmed, CM Punk to AEW confirmed, and CM Punk to AEW confirmed. Also reviews of SmackDown and Rampage. So if you didn’t hear...CM Punk to AEW confirmed.

On AEW Rampage last night, CM Punk debuted for AEW, setting up an All Out match with

Darby Allin, and gifting free ice creams to the crowd in attendance in the process.

The wrestling world was overjoyed at the debut, with love being thrown around online.

Punk appeared with Tony Khan on a media call after the debut, where he spoke on several topics, including how his signing came about, and more details on his contract status.

Initially, Punk said he didn’t want to disclose how long his contract is for, but it’s not a short-term deal, and nor is it part-time.

The return was spoken about with Tony Khan for about 18 months, with Punk returning to

wrestling without fans is not really being a consideration.

He also mentioned how they had designed this debut to be the worst kept secret in wrestling.

They wanted the surprise but wanted everyone to anticipate it, with Punk mentioning how

he wasn’t being kept hidden backstage before the show.

He also spoke on what influenced him to sign with AEW, and one of the things that left

an impression on him the most was Brodie Lee’s passing:

“You know this goes back to one of the appealing things about AEW for me.

It’s a bit of a bummer of a topic.

Brodie Lee passes away, right?

Come to find out, he was sick, but nobody knew.

Nobody said anything to anybody because it’s

nobody’s business.

A lot of respect for everybody back here...If

that were anywhere else, it would be all over

the internet.

His poor wife would be having to deal with that.

On top of already dealing with this tragic event.”

“So I think a lot of people back here were in on it.

They knew I was going to be here but they weren't sure, and man isn't that fun?

Isn't that fun? Worst kept secret designed that way for a reason.

You can criticize and say well, 'they should

advertise, maybe the ratings will be better.'

It's about the moments.

It's about the moments and making people go

'oh man, I can't miss the show I don't know

what's going to happen.

This is fun and I want to be a part of it.”

In terms of his future in AEW, he said he’s

sure he’d do a bit of everything, commentary,

wrestling and he wants to give back to wrestling.

Punk also listed Jungle Boy, The Young Bucks,

Kenny Omega, Pillman, Hobbs, Starks, as well

as “who knows who else is coming”.

Maybe a little hint to that “major acquisition”

that AEW reportedly has lined up.

CM Punk to AEW confirmed.

And now it’s time for my review of God I

Wish I Was Reviewing Rampage, in about 5 minutes.

SmackDown began with a recap video package

of Rollins’ promo from last week, which

was really long, and then out came Edge, who

cut a fiery promo, saying that Rollins was

right in what he said last week, but he doesn’t

know the monster he’s going to unleash,

he can find the place where his blood turns

black, etc. which was all some lovely foreshadowing

for later in the night.

The Mysterious continued their teased tension,

with Rey asking Dom to watch his back in his

the upcoming match against Jimmy Uso.

Which they had a little graphic for, and then

cut to an ad break.

And then when they came back it was Rey Mysterio

vs Jey Uso, as if we wouldn’t notice the

difference.

You’ve made them different characters for

a reason, they’re not interchangeable anymore.

We also got a recap, keep track of how many

times I say that word in this review, of the

Mysterious beating Ziggler and Roode at Backlash.

Also, Jesus Christ, can they do anything else

to build this feud than a bunch of singles

matches between the tag teams?

Dominik took his dad’s advice and looked

out for him in the match, attempting to do

the assisted pin that had worked before, but

this time the referee saw him so Rey got upset

at him for getting involved or something.

But he’s doing what you told him to do Rey,

he’s looking out for you.

Also, you liked it when he did it before, when

it worked.

So what’s your problem now?

We got a - recap - of Corbin stealing Big

E’s briefcase from last week, before Corbin

had a fairly uninteresting match with Kevin

Owens.

This ended when Big E decided he now wanted

to take his briefcase back, so come out to

get it.

But then Corbin got the briefcase back and

then ran away.

They’re doing the same thing they did with

Corbin’s crown, but now it’s Corbin that

is keeping it.

This made Big E look terrible, and does not

much for Corbin.

We’ve already seen this, and it wasn’t

good the first time.

Before a Bianca Belair backstage promo, we

got a - recap video package - of the contract

signing from last week, which lasted 1 minute

and 50 seconds somehow.

Belair cuts a promo saying she’s going to

face both Vega and Carmella tonight, because

she can.

Shotzi & Nox faced Natalya & Tamina next,

and if you’re keeping track, that’s the

the third time they’ve done so.

Except this one was a Championship Contender’s

Match.

And the other ones weren’t.

So now in WWE according to this, you need

to beat the champions, to earn a Championship

Contender’s Match, where if you beat the

champions again, you then get a title shot.

You have to beat the champions three times

to actually become champions.

That is ludicrously stupid.

And of course, we got a recap - of Shotzi

& Nox beating them from two weeks ago, just

to hammer home how stupid this story is.

What’s even more stupid is Shotzi getting

the rollup win and commentary saying “what

a big upset!”

How is it possibly an upset if they’ve already

beaten them twice, and the champions haven’t

beaten them once?

Just make it make sense.

We then got a recap of Edge’s promo from

earlier in the night, before we’re told

that Seth Rollins is next, and Michael Cole

calls him the Visionary of Drip.

Please never say that again.

After Seth is cutting another very good promo,

he is interrupted by the start of The Brood

the theme, before Edge appears on the Tron and

cuts a spooky promo, and then dumps a bloodbath

on Seth, but the blood is black.

And you know, on the surface, I’d have thought

I’d have hated this.

But I think it actually came off pretty cool.

Seth sold it great, and the crowd were sufficiently

happy.

This was good stuff.

As Seth was slowly getting to his feet, the

crowd soaking in what had happened, no time

to think about that, look here’s a mother******

recap of Otis, that’s what you wanted isn’t

it?

Otis faced Montez Ford, but not before we

get a goddamn recap of the bloodbath we literally.

Just.

Saw.

Otis won with a Vader Bomb.

We then got another f****** recap of Shinsuke

winning the Intercontinental Championship,

before he and Boogs teamed to face Crews and

Commander Azeez.

And Boogs won by pinning Crews.

Thanks for coming Crews, back down the card

you go, mate.

Also, what in god’s name was the point in

protecting Azeez so much, barely having him

wrestle, always having him being a lurking

presence, people selling his moves like they’d

been shot, if he’s just going to be used

as another dude in a tag match.

What 

was the point of all those months of protection

since WrestleMania?

Like. Come on, man.

This is why I just don’t get invested in stuff.

Because if I’d cared about Azeez, I now

would be disappointed.

The solution to that is to not care.

Boogs looked good though.

We got, yet another recap, of the contract

signing from last week that they’d already

recapped on this show.

Why aren’t more people annoyed by this?

Bianca Belair then beat Zelina Vega, and Carmella.

Good for her.

A champion that’s booked strong, that’s nice.

In the graphic telling us, it’s Banks vs

Belair at SummerSlam though, why did they

photoshop Banks’ hair to be black?

Just...bit weird innit.

And then we had the Reigns vs Cena face to face.

And you guys know how I felt last week about

it, so did they redeem themselves this week

and prove why they should have another promo

segment?

No. They didn’t.

Reigns begin by saying Cena can’t beat

him because no one has beaten this version

of Roman Reigns.

Alright.

Cena says 1, 2, 3 a lot, and then says the

the contract he signed for this match in big letters

is hardly legally binding.

I’m sorry...just need a second here...hold

on...just...WHAT?!

That’s the entire crux of this story, it’s

why this match is even happening in the first place.

And yes, the contract being signed like that

was incredibly stupid, and he’s 100% right,

it’s not legally binding, so why the f***

did it happen in the first place then?

Why is this match happening if the contract wasn’t binding?

None of this should be happening then, should it?

This company drives me f****** insane.

You can’t tell me one thing one week and

then another thing another week, that’s

just not how stories work.

And then after that, Cena rolls up Roman and

pretends to get a 3 count, which was actually

too quick to be a 3 count, as demonstrated

by the commentary screaming 1 2 3!!!

After Roman had kicked out, and then Cena

acted as though he got a 3 count, and Roman

looked like a fool.

Hated all of this, was worse than last week’s.

This has once again, made me actively less

interested in the SummerSlam match.

And to top it all off, in Roman’s promo

he says that if he can’t beat Cena, he’ll

leave WWE.

Cool, so Roman’s winning then.

Thanks for robbing me of all potential that

Cena could win.

For those curious, there were 10 recaps on

this show, totaling a runtime of 8 minutes

and 10 seconds.

Not including the transitions in and out,

or commentary talking about them.

If you take out ad break time, this becomes

about an 80-90minute show, and over 10% of

it is stuff you’ve already seen.

That’s insane.

I’d ask what you thought of the show, but

really who cares?

CM Punk returned on Rampage.

This was one of the most uninteresting, boring,

vanilla, uninspired go-home shows I’ve seen

in recent memory.

And this is for SummerSlam.

The show they’re trying to make feel as

big as WrestleMania this year.

And this is how you build to it.

God, I’m done.

Take it away Tempest, review the show that people actually cared about.

Thanks for reading this Blog.